Lately I have been working on letting go. Not just the airy fairy “let go you can’t control it” BS but really and truly trusting in the Universe, in God, in something larger than myself to help support me along the way. Now I know that sounds like a whole lot of heavy doo doo but given that I am a fairly silly person, I couldn’t help but think about how we could chat about the process of letting go in a way that would help us laugh about it all.
I have never seen the movie Frozen but have heard enough people with children talk about it and heard this song a thousand times on the radio and TV. It is so interesting how children’s movies these days lend themselves to giving us adults the kind of life lessons that end up being lost on the younger generations. In watching this YouTube video this morning I was struck but the sheer silliness of the drama that the character, Elsa, is portraying in the song. Doesn’t that feel EXACTLY what it is like to actually let go of something for real?!
These days I have let go or had things removed from my life at a dizzying pace. So much so that my life is beginning to be unrecognizable. There are some things that have remained stable, thank god for that, but mostly as I move forward more things continue to change. I was talking to a friend about this and all she said is “that’s good.” What? That’s good? Hmmmmm deep thoughts…..how might that be a good thing? I didn’t ask for any of this, or did I?
I must say I am slowly getting to a place of understanding that not being able to recognize my life is indeed a WONDERFUL thing because it is helping me rebuild in a way that is more sustaining and fulfilling. The act of surrendering to this process has been more like a coming to experience. It has been at times very scary (ok let’s just say most times it is very scary) but in time I let go a little, then a little more and then a little more. Insights have been coming to me the more I surrender my will. For those of you that don’t know me, I will tell you I am generally quite willful. But I must say that letting go of my will and the illusion of control has been liberating. I don’t have to be working so hard. Isn’t that a good thing? Well yes and no. Yes it’s freeing to work on accepting that life doesn’t have to be hard. No because it’s like unlearning a life long pattern of being. While both are true I am beginning to see that opportunities tend to arise when I am putting in less effort. When I take an action or ask for guidance and then sit back to bask in the sunlight, what do you know? People email me seeking my services! I know it sounds like magical thinking but it’s true. It has been happening just like this.
Surrendering my will, turning it over and asking for support and guidance are all spiritual concepts that I believe in intellectually but have always had a hard time practicing. Yet recently I let go of something that I put my heart and soul into, worked myself to the bone to build and found that it wasn’t going anywhere. So when you think about it, what do you have to lose? I know A LOT about working hard and being driven but creating balance has been an ongoing life lesson. I always like to say that I am in recovery from being Type A and it really depends on the moment of the day how much I am in recovery. But like any healing journey you learn along the way. It is all how you handle it. You can flip out and get emotionally reactive, or you can take a deep breath and
LET IT GO, LET IT GO!
Are you in the driver’s seat or are you the co-pilot? For me, when I am in the driver’s seat things sometimes don’t come out quite as good as when I can share the load with the Universe and have a co-pilot. You can steer the ship yourself or , like any good sailer, you can learn how to work with the elements and share the responsibility. Be well. Take care of yourself and for god sake,
(she says to herself….:)