Lately it feels like life continues to change on a moment’s notice. Soba Yoga, my new yoga project for addictions, has begun and the impending changes are underway. I have had little to no time lately and I have missed you all terribly. I have been overwhelmed lately and have wanted to hibernate for a long winter’s nap. I imagine everyone in the Northeast is beginning to feel this way! Yet every time I get myself up and going I am taken on another amazing ride. These days, more than ever, releasing control of the steering wheel is where life begins. This may sound like a joke to you. As I write it, I almost snorted in my tea. Letting go of the reins of control is the LAST thing I am ever likely to do. I have been told that I can be a bit of a control freak. This is probably partly or fully true. I am used to being able to fend for myself. I am not the kind of person that takes direction easily as my own inner compass has always guided me in the right direction. In our last chat,Cultivate your Own Inner Knowing we discussed intuition and psychic energy. Connecting in with your intuition requires that you begin to release the noose hold yo have on your environment. Control often is about asserting the ego. When we lead with our egos we are living in our heads. The gut is where intuition rules. Therefore intuition and your pesky issues with control can not coexist. They are not friendly roommates. They are more like the roommates that bicker silently back and forth. You know you have had one of those; maybe you have been one too! Ooooo do I remember those days with a shiver. In order to be more connected with the wisdom of your inner guide, you need to let the ego step aside. You may be wondering “how does one do that?” Well as I say, I am no expert in this area, but I will share what I am finding out.
Have you ever worked really hard to make something happen and despite all your best efforts things still turn out different than you imagined? Isn’t this maddening? Well I have come to realize that generally when this happens to me, it is because the direction I was heading in was not where I was meant to head. Relationships seem to fizzle out, people flake out not returning communication, you don’t get that job you wanted, you intercommunicate despite trying to be clear and the list goes on. You could scream and yell or pull your hair out but what would it be like to just notice what is occurring. In moments when I can slow down enough to notice, I am often amazed at the fact that generally speaking things still seem to be pretty good or amazing even though they don’t look like I thought they would. I am learning this lesson over and over again lately; continuously. Hmmm think there is a lesson the Universe is trying to tell me? Most likely the answer is a resounding YES. Life is ever moving and flowing. Why things don’t happen in the way you think they will may be a mystery. But it’s not one you need to spend much time trying to figure out. Or at least that is what I have found. Typically, the answers are revealed to you in time if you are present to witness them. When I find myself all tied up in a knot about something I try to remind myself to breathe and remember that each encounter I have or don’t have with someone is part of an intricate puzzle. Some pieces have been thrown in the mix to fit and some are extra that the company put in that are meant to be tossed aside. If you continue to try to put the puzzle together with the pieces that are not meant to ffit you will continue to spin your wheels and never move forward in life. As you can imagine, puzzles were NEVER my favorite past time. LOL I would always find myself getting way to frustrated to quickly. But when I think of this analogy for life, it seems a little more forgiving. The pieces that have not really fit have taught me just as much or more about myself than those that slipped right into place.
Releasing control is an ongoing process. I find that it will probably be my life’s work. Lately I am working on being in awe of all that surrounds me. A project whose idea roots back five years ago came together within two months. It is not sprouting exactly as I would have it but it is…period. It has it’s own breath and life. it is not me…the idea was only born from me…and a very good friend. It will do it’s own twists and turns. It will want to hibernate in order to then birth forward. If I can standby as a witness, almost like an elder, than I can be constantly amazed by it’s beauty. If I get into the core of it and try to manipulate it left and right it will surely suffocate. This is the wisdom that comes up from inside as we sit here having tea at one of my favorite Somerville cafes. Releasing control can be touch but it also can be freeing. I don’t have to be the driver all the time; I can also be the passenger in the car. Being the passenger is often times more fun as you notice things that the driver can not. How do you release control? What insights have you learned about yourself during the process? Here’s to being the passenger in life and allowing yourself to constantly be amazed by the beauty all around.
Your idea inspired me in a gentle and comfortable way. it is not like a big BANG in my heart but a cosy breeze and wave.
Aww that's so cool! That is exactly the feeling that I was getting when I was writing:) Best wishes along your continued journey:)