Cause You Got to Have Faith


After a chat with a friend about faith I have George Michael on the mind.  I LOVE George Michael…like for real.  I loved him in the 80’s when I danced to his videos on MTV and I loved him six years ago when I saw him in concert.  I am a sucker for catchy pop tunes; maybe it’s the dancer in me. You can’t really grow up going to dance school and not like pop music:)  So Faith…yes that illustrious thing that we are often told to take a step out on.  Having faith is incredibly counter-intuitive to my obsessive fear based mentality. Yet these days it’s coming freely and easily.  I am still in the midst of change; the in between point where you know where you would like to go but the details are not ironed out yet.  Even with things being up in the air, I am finding it very easy to believe in the big picture coming together.  It’s almost like some
aliens came into my tree house (I live way up in the sky in a three decka as we call them in Boston)  night and stole the part of my brain that causes me to freeze like a deer and expect the sky to fall.  Honestly, this faith based living is not generally my mode of operation.   Instead of spending my time freaking out about things falling apart before they come together, my brain is constantly thinking about the building process.  Not only the things that need to get done but the ways I can make the project more amazing. So your wondering…what the hell happened and how can I get some of that?  Well I will tell you the secret ingredient (like the cinnamon in my chocolate chip cookies when I make them) it’s creating for the sake of the whole.  What mumbo jumbo yogic language are you talking….you may be wondering (or at least that is what I would wonder if I were you.)
Here’s the thing….I believe that most of my ideas of breaking away from traditional 9-5 social work jobs have not only been about working for myself, doing something totally different and ditching the idea that I have to be struggling financially to help people but they have also been about ditching the social work profession altogether.  I have many times wondered why I got this degree that I will need to pay off for the rest of my life.  I have had this love/hate relationship with the field that has me chained to paying an insane amount of money for jobs that are burnout and pay ridiculously low.  What I was forgetting was why I went into the field in the first place.  I always wanted to be a part of creating social change.  I went into the field wanting to be an advocate. Back then I was feistier (angrier actually) and would talk loudly about my liberal views to anyone who would listen (which most likely was not many because I was too bullish at the time.) Thankfully, yoga and many other things along with age have rounded off the sharp edges and help me release the anger.  But there still remains a part of me at the core that is comfortable speaking my mind and is most uncomfortable when I silence myself to keep the peace.  The loop that ties it all together these days is that this current social action that I am working on comes from a place of love and a wish to create a healing community.  What was missing in the past was my own healing and a sense of contentment within myself.
Now as I move forward, I find that I am moved to share the belief that this is possible for all; especially for those who have been through great turmoil and have a variety of labels attached to them. My core belief  is that we are so much more than the labels that society attaches to us.  These labels limit possibility and even perpetuate the belief that things will always be the way they are.  I know I am definitely not the same person now that I was 17 years ago when I entered graduate school.  I am not even the person who I was last year or a month ago for that matter. We are all ever changing. The use of labels perpetuatesfear and thereby makes the possibility of transformation a mere hope rather than something one could have faith will come into fruition.  We are so much more than our wounds and the labels that are imposed upon us.  Transformation is not for some, it’s for all who want it.  It doesn’t come knocking at your door like the pizza delivery guy or Indian food if you are me. Rather it is something you have to actively pursue.  I have had moments of tears of disbelief that this is where I am at and then I have reminded myself that I did this.  I made this change.  I pursued my own healing path and along the way gathered a poop load (literally in regards to my nutrition training:) of information that I now have the ability to share with others.  There is no coincidence that I am in the place I am in today.  I set the intention to not stay stuck and you can too.  We all act with our feet each day making decisions on what we eat, who we spend time with, who we choose to get into relationship with, what jobs we choose to take, where we choose to live, etc.  We come into this world with karma that contributes to this process but we also have free will.  What choices have you been making recently that are helping you transform?  Are there things or ways of being that no longer service you?  If so, maybe it’s time to begin to let go of the tight grip and choose your happiness today.   Take a step out today cause you got to have faith!

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