What causes that tingling feeling of love in the body. The thing that people sometimes call “chemistry?”  It is said that people know within the first five seconds of meeting someone whether they connect with them or not.  What is that and how does this fit into overall wellness?  Oxytocin is a neurotransmitter in the brain that gets stimulated during sex, birth, breast feeding, hugging, kissing, even shaking hands and smiling.  It is the hormone in the body that makes you feel tingling.  It lights up the reward center in the brain that rests underneath the cerebral cortex.  Hmmm sound familiar?  In an earlier post The Ties that Bind Us  we discussed the reward center as it relates to addictive substances such as drugs, alcohol and sugar.  I also shared that the “feel good” neurotransmitter, dopamine, gets released into the body when the reward center is lit up.  Wait  a minute am I suggesting that oyxtocin reacts the same way in the body as these other substances?  Yes I sure am.  Being in contact with others socially does the same thing as eating a cookie, shopping or using drugs.  The same exact thing.  In fact what’s at the core of craving for these substances/behaviors is often a need for connection. I have talked previously about my emotional connection with sugar. It’s the same for most people.  In 12 step meetings they talk about addictions as stemming from a “hole in the soul” that gets filled with the person’s substance of choice.  It’s the same thing that occurs with other behaviors.  It’s a momentary escape from that hole.  A momentary fix for a deeper problem.  So how do we trade up for healthier ways of getting that good old feeling?Connection, connection, connection.  My Gram talked today about how she notices a change that has happened over time.  People are less connected. There are fewer close knit communities.  Tom Shadyac discussed this in his documentary “I Am.”  Shadyac of Nutty Professor and Bruce Almighty fame, details his journey towards spiritual awakening in this brilliant film.  He describes being in the foyer of his dreamed of mansion….alone.  The film chronicles his shift as well as the shift that is needed globally.  Astrologists have also been speaking about this global shift for some time.  The old “me” paradigm is crumbling and in it’s place a paradigm more focused on love and “we” is replacing it.  The shift is happening on an individual basis within a lot of people these days, me being one of them.  People are demanding cleaner food sources, supporting local businesses  and making changes to bring themselves into a deeper sense of true happiness.  There is no better time than the present.  Making the shift towards increasing love in your life can happen in small ways every day.  Smiling or chatting with a stranger, holding the door open for someone, allowing someone to go before you.  These are simple but profound gestures at decreasing the focus on the self and increasing connection with the other.

Happiness is born from the decisions we make on a moment to moment daily basis.  What ways can you continue to increase the amazing affects of oxytocin in your life?  By connecting with others, you may begin to see your need for other not so healthy behaviors decrease.  For me it’s a gradual shift that happens more often when I am present with what I really need.  The piece of chocolate’s affects are fleeting but a hug from my Gram…well that lasts forever:)

So to steal a line from a movie about love…soon you will begin to see that Love Actually is….everywhere:)

Cheers!